literature

Distance

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EternalSunday's avatar
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Literature Text

You saw me for the very first time on a bright summer day when there was not a single cloud in the sky. You were amazed by my sparkling green eyes and my pure white skin, and I seemed perfect to you. But you had been taught that perfection does not exist, so you doubted it.

Ever since that day your eyes followed my every movement. You watched me from far away, absorbed by the beauty you thought I possessed.. You were so sure that I wouldn't ever notice you, that you couldn't see I already had.

I approached you myself one day, curious as to who you might be. I introduced myself and started to talk. We both asked questions, none of us giving any real answers, but you weren't bothered by it. You just loved the way I smiled. We talked until we had nothing left to say, and our first conversation slowly turned into an awkward silence. Both of us were too shy to break it. So we waved goodbye, still smiling at each other. My innocent smile skin reminded you of an angel. But you had been taught angels does not exist, so you couldn't help but to doubt my innocence.

Our paths crossed countless times after that first time and our empty small talk turned into long, meaningful conversations. But still, I remained a mystery to you. You wanted to know more about me, so you started to wonder about my past. By that time, I almost trusted you completly, so I gave away all my dark secrets and  told you my gruesome story.  And it was nothing like the fairytale you had imagined. You could barely believe a person with a bright smile like mine could have gone through such darkness. But I had and yet I smiled. But you had been taught that no one who has suffered can still smile, so you started to doubt my happiness.  My eyes no longer seemed sparkling to you, and my pale skin was no longer pure.  You were convinced that innocence could only live in those who have never seen cruelty.

But somehow, you were still amazed by me. You said that you wanted to know me, inside and out. And you didn't believe me, when I answered that  truly knowing someone is impossible. No matter how many times I said it.

You had seen me as I appeared to be right now, knew of my past and had listened to my innermost thoughts. But you still dind't know who I was. You couldn't accept that, so you tried to find the key to my heart, only to find out mine used a combination code.  And I told you not to search for something that cannot be found, but you just wouldn't listen to me. Giving up was not an option for you. You were so sure that you would find all the answers, You kept staring at your half-finished puzzle, still not able to see a clear image. But you had all the pieces, you just didn't know how to put them all together.  

And once you thought you had finally solved the puzzle, new pieces appeared.

And then, one day, you started to doubt yourself, because I had taught you that nobody is really who they seem to be.
I have no idea where this came from, it just did. This is what happens when I should be sleeping....

I wrote this in the middle of the night, so if it doesn't make sense, then that's why. :)

This is my first REAL attempt at writing a story in english (unless you count boring school assignments), so please forgive possible grammar mistakes.

Please comment or critique, I really want to know what you think about this one. :D
© 2010 - 2024 EternalSunday
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stevecook23's avatar
If English isn't your first language, this puts me and a lot of others to shame. You have a good grasp of grammar and sentence structure; there's one spelling mistake near the beginning, 'curios' should be 'curious' and otherwise it's fine.

Definitely the idea of the characters comes through very strongly; there's no dialogue, but in a way we can fill that in ourselves. There's an almost fairytale quality to it, and I'm glad that, at the end, there's an ambiguous, possibly-happy ending. I say this because, at the end, the male character begins to see the world in a different light; that's the change in this story, his perception, and the breaking down of his ideas about how the world should be. In that change, there's room for emotion and for acceptance.

I found this through your member feature on :iconwriters--club: so well done!